You know those questions you’ve always wanted to ask a woman, but never thought you’d get a straight answer? Well, we did all the work for you. A simple survey got these six hot questions from guys, and we got the girl to answer them for you. Let these things be a mystery no more, what exactly is going on in a girl’s head?

1. Do women fake it?

Yes, is the short answer to that. And most women do at some point. Will you know? Probably not, unless you know your partner extremely well, or she’s a really bad actress. Why? Well, my only defense to this (which is in fact straight up lying to your partner, really), is that if you were less goal-oriented, I wouldn’t feel the need to fake it. By that I mean that if you are man enough to understand that sometimes it’s just not going to happen (because I’m tired, or stressed, or just not in the right place), and can understand that I can have sex and enjoy myself without having an orgasm, then I won’t fake it. On the other hand, if you’re going to take it as a challenge and redouble your efforts and not take my feelings into account, then yeah, I’m going to fake it so I can get my cuddles and go to sleep. Simple as that really.

2. What do women do in the bathroom?

You mean other than the obvious? Yeah, I get your point, we can spend ages in there. We do the normal stuff, and then changing a tampon can take a little time, if that’s an issue. Other than that it’s mostly primping, to be honest. Lipstick check, making sure my mascara isn’t smudged, that kind of stuff. Makeup takes a lot of upkeep, you can’t just put it on and go, you need to adjust and reapply every couple of hours, so that’s what’s taking the time.

3. Why do women say nothing’s wrong when there’s obviously something wrong?

Ah, one of the eternal mysteries of life. Honestly, I don’t know. I know when I say it that it’s a stupid thing to say, but I do it anyway. I think part of it is that I’m already pissed off so I want you to work a bit harder to get the info out of me as a kind of punishment. Occasionally, it’s because I haven’t precisely formulated what’s wrong yet, although I know I’m mad, I need a little time to put it into words. But mostly, I have absolutely no idea. It just seems to happen, as much as I know it shouldn’t.

4. So, when women say nothing’s wrong, what the hell am I supposed to do?

That’s a bit easier. There’s a pretty simple routine you can go through, although it might take swallowing your pride a bit. When she says ‘nothing’, you say ‘but I can see that something is bothering you, please tell me what it is, I hate it when you’re unhappy.’ You must say this without anger, and without defensiveness, it must be as disarming as possible. Even a hand on the shoulder might help. As soon as you start to show anger or defensiveness or even frustration, she’s just going to get even more mad. So keep it reasonable. If she continues to say ‘nothing,’ then leave it with a simple ‘okay then, but if you want to talk about it, I’m here.’ That should avoid the argument.

5. What’s in your bag?

Everything. Seriously. Yeah, it weighs a ton, but at least I’m well-prepared. Partly I carry everything because being a girl requires maintenance, so there’s makeup, tampons, spare underwear (for bloody accidents, rather than wetting accidents, thank you very much), spare pantyhose, stain removing tissues, that kind of thing. But it’s also because you never know what’s going to happen, or where you’re going to spend the night. You know what though? When you need a pair of pantyhose to fix the fanbelt on your car, or a wet tissue to get the mustard off your tie, you’ll be damn grateful that I carry my entire life around in my bag.

6. Seriously, do women like going down on me?

That’s a loaded question. Am I dying to put your genitals into my mouth? Er, no, not really, to be honest. I do, however, enjoy seeing you turned on, and adore the power that I have simply by using my mouth, so from that point of view, yes, I enjoy it very much. So it’s a bit of a toss up. But if it makes you feel better, I, like most women, don’t make a practice of doing things I don’t want to do, so if I’m doing it, it means I want to. Believe it or not, I do want to please you, and if I know that a blow job turns you on, then it’s going to turn me on too, if that makes sense…

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